JYSim for jobless-yokel Sim

Nobody paid me anything for this post. I write this out of my love for our national carrier as well as my admiration on how this airline maintained its flawless image of excellent quality despite (worrying) financial problems.
2 years ago around winter we (my family and I) toured Beijing and our flight was, inevitably, with MAS. That was my first medium-haul flight and I did not have any idea of how an airline onboard service should be. As far as I can recall, I did slept on that flight (which I later realised is oh-so-difficult, especially in economy class), food was great (compared with KLM’s) and my knees were never crushed by the seat in front of me.
2 years later I flew KLM and Alitalia for AFS, and later with China Airlines to ROC, and that’s when I realise how good MAS is. First of all, let’s start with how bad others did…
KLM
Upon boarding, there were stewardesses greeting you onboard, but they were more than reluctant to assist you with your hand luggage. I personally have to help others (esp. girls) in my group to load their baggage. They did not show you to your seat (as MAS did). The only thing you felt welcomed is the 12-inch screen above the aisle writting ‘Welcome Onboard KLM’ and several swans pecking each other (icon of KLM).
I was not asked of my meal choice on my first flight. It felt like a privilege to be served, but in fact it should be the opposite. Legroom was unbearable, and you can as well imagine that when you’re in the window seat and the passenger in front of you is a huge 6′ 2′ Caucasian.
It’s funny to realise that you actually disembark later than your stewardesses and stewards. They’re 300m in front of you, with their boring sea-blue uniform trotting towards immigration while you’re still struggling with your luggage and 300+ passengers jostling for the exit.

Alitalia
Aside strikingly gorgeous stewardesses with their green-red-white scarves, serving with a smile is as precious as a diamond onboard the 30 year old aircraft. Anyway, legroom was fine, so as the food and beverages. Italian airports are horrendous to land in when you have huge and eye-catching luggages. Twice my luggage was almost forced open with the second attempt successfully removing the baggage straps (one more step to opening the trunk of valuables).
Boarding was ridiculous as you are so packed into sardine-can buses before they drop you 50 feet away from the aircraft and you can actually walk beside the engines and drop a your boarding pass in (which will cause the engine to explode later).

After learning my lesson with these European carriers, I so fortunately have to take another sector home after KLM touched down in KL. The whole process was very pleasant and, despite the old aircraft, you feel so at home. I might have mentioned this, but it’s worth re-mentioning. It’s a MAS stewardess who reminds me it’s the Chinese New Year season, and it’s another MAS steward who helped me with my oversized hand baggage while jokingly asked if I shopped too much for ‘aunties’ at home.
China Airlines
Cabin was immaculate and brightly new, but the drawback of using young crews is, obviously, they have no sense of service and not an niche of problem-solving skills. Other aspects fine otherwise. Besides the gleeful check-in personnel who so-gladly charged us for overweight baggage, and some turbulences because they’re stingy to fly a bigger aircraft, and the creative-but-not-necessarily-fun in-flight entertainment, China Airlines is a pleasant carrier if you’re price-sensitive.

Last weekend while browsing through Caucasians boasting how good Singapore Airlines is, I saw this link (http://www.airliners.net/discussions/trip_reports/read.main/61808) which leads to this trip report written by an Australian who flew literally around the world with MAS. Before this I always thought MAS is at-least comparable to Singapore, but seeing how the Australian described his wonderful experiences with MAS Singapore is cast into total shame. First of all, Singapore Airlines is, undeniably ‘Singaporean’. Usual carriers have Y and M for economy class, they have an extra, Q, for discounted fares. What? I buy a Q ticket, I’m not entitled for the emergency exit row? Or do I get smaller portions of wine? And speaking about wine, it’s almost free-flowing for Caucasians, but if you’re not, better watch out! Asians are prone to get drunk and we don’t usually serve wine for Asians, sorry, and get back to your seat.
Further research into Skytrax proved me right. In almost every category (esp. so in economy class and cabin crew), Singapore is not as good as Malaysian, the airline lounge included.
However, these accusations of Singapore is not to be proved correct for the time being as I have not got chance to fly with the ‘big fat goose’.
I understand that you might think MAS as the same level as other ‘Malaysia’ related products i.e. Proton, Putrajaya etc, but trust me, this is a real catch. Can’t it be anyhow untrue if, according to Skytrax, a passenger is so grateful she even presented the crew with a souvenir (of course this fella must be Caucasian).
Given the track record of MAS, I’m sure it will soon be awarded the airline of the year (which it already grabbed once in 2004). Should MAS not be in a financial crisis we could as well boast about it next year (Visit Malaysia Year 2007).
Once again, nobody paid me anything, but I’d like to urge so many readers here (half of them came to know this by my never-tiring advertisement), fly MAS, even when you have other options and cheaper fares (as in AirAsia). I comprehend Malaysians are mostly price-sensitive but would you rather be treated like a royalty by paying a little more than to be abused and break your knee when the person in front of you reclines?
Fly Malaysia Airlines -
World’s Best Cabin Staff 2001, 2002, 2003, 2004
Skytrax Quality-Certified 5-star Airline (mind you, AirAsia is only 3)
Airline of the Year 2004
Best South-East Asian Airline 2005
Best Economy Class 2006
Best Cabin Staff in the World (Top 3 Airlines)
Best Cabin Staff for Asia (2nd Place)

I apologise should you find this post a little overly commercialised and does not suit your taste. This is my blog, I can do whatever I want, so sue me for not being entertaining enough.

You know you’re deep into F6 when you…
1. don’t trust your calculators anymore - You gotta double, triple and sometimes, quadruple check your answers for math as stupid modulus signs will cannibalise your marks (quoted Mr. Yeap), and sometimes an answer ain’t an answer without quotations of Real Numbers, Integers etc etc. Now that’s deep.
2. force yourself to pre-study before Ms. Cheah starts her one-shot 4-period lesson - If you don’t you’ll be seeing tonnes of stars from the moment she turns on the LCD projector to the moment she says ‘dismiss’. Catching up ain’t easy as she flies by just the way Ang Soo Beng does, with more details of course.
3. even before Mr. Yeap assigns homework, you’ve already finished them - self-explanatory.
4. look into every nook and corner to break any avaliable school rule, except, of course, sexual crimes - from mobile phones to long hair and pornographic, we’re just thankful Chung Ling prefects are not that up-to-date, or rather, not that attentive as to see someone walking with his mobile on his soles and chewing gum in his pocket.
5. you utilise your free periods - to gossip, do more math so that Jun Yi the loser is more threatened and felt inferiorly stupid compared to you, to see counselling teachers on why you dumped JPA.
6. started using specific methods suggested by teachers for solving problems instead of your usual ones (if any) in F5 - you don’t know how or why, but you feel more comfortable with their methods and sometimes, yours just won’t work! Damn it!
7. people around you can’t seem to stop bullying you - cos you’re leaving soon?
8. when you have no other entertainment options, you turn into Microsoft Flight Simulator and crash a 737-400 - take-off, ascend to 10,000 feet, set the autopilots, admire how you’ve just flown a 150-passenger flight so smoothly, and turn off the engines. The show begins when you tilt the aircraft 180 degrees. And please make cockpit announcements before you start the performance.
8. yearn to go cycling when you’re suppose to do extensive catch-ups on chemistry - your soul is so torn apart you felt like giving everything up and go to bed instead.
9. pray that someday Lim Seng Huat’s laptop will fall from the 4th floor - without a laptop he can’t possibly teach, and we’ll have extra free periods!!!
10. during the next Ang Soo Beng’s period you bribe the monitor to ‘lose’ the class’ marker pen - similarly, without a marker for stingy Mr. Ang he can’t possibly teach, so we’ll have extra extra free periods!!!

My heartiest, sincerest and warmest congratulations to all those who succeded their JPA appeal. Please be reminded that a JPA scholarship is such a HUGE honour and you’re obliged to accept it.
Again, I urge you to think again why did you applied for a JPA scholarship. JPA scholarships are so in high demand nowadays that in the process of applying for one we very often blurred our vision and think getting one is so good we’d even die for it. Frankly, I’d been one of these people and I can tell you this isn’t healthy. You’ll ground yourself to the eSila website all the time and spend sleepless nights wondering where you’ll go without a JPA. I go so passive when PosLaju (or PosLayu) misplaced my letter from JPA without a note and even written an obituary. I stupidly think that JPA is my only meal ticket for the next 50 years, forgetting my other friends’ feelings who stumble more than once dealing with the Malaysian government.
My trip to Taiwan ROC proved to be helpful in widening my point of view - JPA ain’t everything. In TCU (Tzu Chi University) I was treated like a royalty. Half a dozen of medical students from Malaysia warmly welcomed us. Their warmth touched me deeply I felt guilty for treating my friends coldly during those SPM days where every minute counts. In TCU I realised academic achievements ain’t everything one can strive for, though till now I can’t figure out what I’d go for besides academic achievements (perhaps, love?).
Back to the point, I urge all JPA scholars to think of why you so desperately want a JPA scholarship. Several statistical-proven frequent answers as below.
1. Because I can go overseas with JPA.
Yes, undeniably you can go overseas, which is an illutionarily excellent idea for developing countries citizens. But think again, especially for ‘ordinary’ (nothing discriminative here) courses i.e. pharm, engineering etc, can’t you do it at local privates? Yes, you pay a relatively expensive sum, but you get an international education, plus NO BOND. Perhaps it’s the fact that Sagittaureans love freedom, but being bonded with the government isn’t something desirable. Yes, you’re guarenteed a job, but I’m sure excellent Chung Ling students need no job-seeking agency to land themselves in IBM or Reynolds.
2. Because everybody’s applying.
When AliCafe shows TV commercials every 5 minutes, does it make it the best coffee in the world? People apply for JPA scholarships because 1. it comes in a whole package, including your student visa, attache and university placement. 2. It’s the only choice for below-average income groups (like Mr. Tan Ying Jing). Nowadays with AusEd, UniEd and things like that we’re guarenteed a good U placement as long as you have blasting good results. For below-income groups with excellent results you actually deserve JPA, so skip everything and go pack up. The amount of students applying for JPA actually glorifies it, and I personally think you should filter the glory and consider seriously. If you can actually afford it, go yourself and save the bond, and give people another chance. If you’re just applying because everybody else is applying, go to hell.
3. JPA good-mah! All expenses covered, what’s wrong with JPA?
The bond dude THE BOND!! Again, Sagittaureans shout aye-aye! 10 years is a little taxing for docs. and God knows who you’ll meet in your 10 years. A stubborn M’ will kill your 10 years by not signing your application for postgrad. 6 years might be relatively short, but you gotta divide your fees and living expenses by the bond and see how much you’re working for the government every year. By the time you finish your bond, those underdogs doing F6 might have overtook you in terms of salary and seniority.
4. Because I won’t have to blast my head off in F6 and end up with a course I don’t like.
In fact F6 leads you to more places including those hidden behind ‘bushes’. My salutations to those who so passionately and grippingly believe in F6. I sincerely hope you’ll end up with a good U, not just those locally, and overtake us at the end. We’re overtakers if we judge the Malaysian Education System strictly. Never deny any possibilities ahead, and frankly, with JPA, you blind yourself from any other alternatives.
I write this not out of pity for 6th Formers but rather to express my surprise after informally interviewing some JPA scholars these couple of days. Ok, I’m so fortunate to be awarded another opportunity before blinding myself and jumping into a pit called JPA, but again, my intentions are genuine. Make your intentions of taking JPA clear and stick to them least you should be unhappy in years to come. And never cheat for any scholarships, no matter how many powerful people you’ve got back there. JPA is not immaculate or anyhow godly, the devil starts after you graduate.
And thus I hereby declare I’m OUT of the JPA formation.

Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to Taipei. Local time is 4.30 pm and local temperature is 28 degrees Centigrade. Weather is predicted to be overcast. Passengers please pay attention when opening the overhead cabin. Baggages may have shifted during the flight and may fall out. Please be reminded that mobile phones and electronic devices are not to be used until you’re inside the terminal building. Once again, thank you for choosing China Airlines. We hope you’ve enjoyed your flight and see you onboard again soon.
11 Days Taiwan Round Island ala-Refugee
Day 1: Chiang Kai-shek Int’l Airport to Taipei via bus carrying 3 oversized and overweight baggage (typical of Dad). Arrival at Mr. Ku’s (Dad’s prof. 22 years ago) humble abode to find that the house was no more than a CLHS classroom, which 4/5 of the space is piled with drawings (typical of artists) and dust. Dinner at a typical Taiwanese snack bar, an uneasy sleep worrying how much dust I’ll inhale and my asthma. Air conditioner groaning all night.
Day 2: Showering in Taipei. Went trotting Taipei with camera, iPod, mobile phone (service provider: ZhongHua DianXin) and a broken umbrella. Places of interest - Taipei 101 (Giordano, bakery and food court), Presidental Place, BeiYi Girls’ School, MRT stations, ZhongZheng Memorial Square, ChenXing 24-hour bookstore, Shabu-shabu (juan-loh) for dinner. Air conditioner groning still, footache.
Day 3: Taipei Main Station to Hualien via train. Trains extremely punctual, not a minute early, not a minute late. Arrival at a showering Hualien, picked up by a host mother arranged by Tzu Chi. 4-hour nap in homestay apartment, drizzle outside, good atmosphere, 23 Celcius. Dinner at homestay apartment, TV at night. Uneventful.
Day 4: Examination at Tzu Chi University. Friendly staff, helpful Malaysian alumni and seniors, splendid school grounds. Everything in traditional Chinese, dechipering language takes more time than answering, though finally the Chinese exam was relatively easy. Strolling along streets of Hualien at the evenings, purchased train tickets through Mastercard. Dinner at homestay apartment, again,
Day 5: Hualien to Tai-Dong via train. Same punctuality, Malaysians should learn. Meal on train. Picked up by Dad’s junior upon arrival, homestay apartment again. Good weather to visit the Pacific Ocean, camera ran out of battery, almost. Dinner at aborganial village, strange cuisine in dim atmosphere, so you literally can’t see what you’re eating. ‘Garfield’ at 32-inch LCD back home before bedtime.
Day 6: Visited a school Dad taught upon graduation. Huge school with tiled floors, tiled walls and fountains (imagine that in CLHS?). Name of meal for lunch too gruelsome to translate, but delicious anyhow. 4 pm Tai-Dong to Tai-Zhong via train, delayed 30 minutes (ok, Malaysians shouldn’t learn this). Longest train journey I’ve ever took, partly because my sister kept flipping the curtains, causing the sunshine to penetrate my eyelids, and I can’t sleep. Meal on train again. Arrival picked up by Dad’s student. Overnight at kiddo’s playroom with flourescent stars wallpaper, alphabets mat (I still have mine upstairs in the attic) and Johnson & Johnson Baby Bath.
Day 7: Rained like crazy. We decided to challenge fate and went to LuGang (a place where they filmed whichever film last time). Carrying an umbrella strolling through century-old streets. 3/5 dirty, 2/7 similar to the antique zones of Penang. Lost in the small dwindling ‘lorongs’, photographed like crazy. 4 pm at National Taiwan Arts Museum, saw a lot of disfigured nudes, disporportional. Bookmakr costs NT$ 20 (RM2.00+). Full course western dinner NT$480++. First grand Western gourment I’ve had. Food not necessarily tasty. Another house-transfer followed. Was dead tired by then but I did managed to get online for 50 mins before sleeping.
Day 8: Bought Dad’s painting materials, window shopping in a very crowded mall. Tired tired. Dinner at another typical Taiwan snack bar, only this is a little more high class. Tired tired. Slept without bidding hosts good night. Oh yeah, bought ‘Nicholas Again’. Mastercard.
Day 9: Tai-Dong to Taipei via express bus. Worst nightmare ever. Air-conditioning not functional, ‘express’ bus made stops at nearly every interchange. Horrifically unpunctual, dirty, seats uncomfortable and televisions (yeah, they have TVs on the bus) a mere electron gun firing radiation at passengers. Rain like crazy again. Cab back to dusty Mr. Ku’s place, shopped along ShiDa road for Dad’s painting materials. Tired tired. Dinner with Dad’s old classmates, some of whom behaved very student-like, and talking to them don’t actually made you feel isolated. Lots of ex-classmates turned up, in which later crammed into Mr. Ku’s place to see his latest paintings. Slept at 11. Not so dusty anymore, perhaps it’s because I got used to it.
Day 10: Taipei to DanShui via MRT, interesting. Btw, Taipei MRTs made announcements in Chinese, Hokkien (Tai-Yu), Hakka, and distorted, Japanised English. NT$110 return. DanShui relatively comparable to Gurney Drive, but they have at least 30 stalls selling ice cream, ranging from NT$ 1 to NT$ 10 per cone. Overcast but didn’t rain. No robbery (he’s mad, i swear Jun Yi’s mad), lots of 7-11s. Dinner with Dad’s teacher’s classmate (in that case it’s unrelated), free ice-cream. Accomodation transfer to BaLi at Dad’s classmate’s house, nearer to airport and free transport. Watched 45 minutes of ‘The Legend of 1900′. Slept, but felt like I didn’t.
Day 11: Awaken 5.30 am, breakfast by Dad’s classmate, very talkative. Freeway (highway) to airport extremely windy, broke at least 60 traffic rules. Witnessed at least 5 planes landing and take off. Check-in chaotic, overweight baggage charged NT$ 4000+, thanks to Dad’s friends, who kept gaving books. Saw 2 MAS’ planes, 1 Singapore Airlines. Boarding delay, departure on time.
Good afternoon ladies and gentlemen, welcome to Penang. Local time is 12.56 pm and temperature is 28 degrees Centigrade. Weather is predicted to be overcast. Passengers please pay attention
when opening the overhead cabin. Baggages may have shifted during the
flight and may fall out. Please be reminded that mobile phones and
electronic devices are not to be used until you’re inside the terminal
building. The Malaysian authority would like to remind you that drug trafficking is illegal in Malaysia and carries mandatory death sentence. Once again, thank you for choosing China Airlines. We hope you’ve enjoyed your flight and see you onboard again soon.