JYSim for jobless-yokel Sim

What do you do when…
Dad (repeat: Dad) received a letter supposedly for you (repeat: you) at his place (i never wrote my Dad’s address in any applications as far as i know), and it’s the long-awaited call-for-selection-test by the Japanese Government?
You answer Dad’s call, said ‘ok, take it back and we’ll see later,’ hung up, and went back for your disconnected nap.
You get to know your selection test will be held in KL?
Curse 67 times, later surf airasia.com to see if they have any 0.99 or 9.99 tickets left.
Test date: 30 April 2006?
1st of May is a public holiday, so Tony Fernendez will not be so stupid as to offer 0.99 tickets. Curse 67 times more.
Coincidentally, your aunt from KL will do a trip up north on the 30th April weekend? (that means no free transport anymore. Your uncle is busier than Abdullah himself and you gotta be more VVIP than Bush to ask him to fetch you from the airport).
Casually ask Dad and family if they’re going (or thinking of going) to KL this weekend.
Dad can’t make up his mind by 27th and AirAsia ticket prices are mounting day by day. Express buses aren’t a good choice as 1. it’s long weekend, and 2. chances of ‘resting in pieces’ on PLUS is actually higher than doing a bungee jump?
Call up your aunt and ask her whether there’re any HUGE discount sales in KL recently.
Your aunt told you they have this super cheap sale in Sogo, and your family is very excited about it?
Say 135 prayers (67 + 67 = 134, 1 extra for sincerity). You will have free rides!
Dad told you he can only start driving on 29th April, 3pm?
Make a rule stating if anyone are to request for piss-call, the price will be RM300 for the first 3 minutes and RM200 extra for each subsequent minute.
You arrived at KL safely, 7.30 pm, and your cousin (female) already whipped up plans to burn off the night intending to doze you off at the exam hall tomorrow?
Ask for beer(s) from your uncle, wallup all of them and glue yourself on the bed before she’s in for another session of mahjong. (Disclaimer: my cousin and us (+ my sister) are actually very close-knit, just that I need sleep to at least know how to write my name during the exam tomorrow).
Woke up the next day, arrived at the specified venue to discover there’re 500+ applicants?
Mentally prepare yourself to receive a letter starting with ‘dukacita’ the next month.
Found the exam hall is damn cold and you’re like the only one without a cardigan / sweater?
Wrap yourself with the curtains! (just kidding).
Found yourself sitting for Japanese Language exam even though your Japanese is currently Greek to you?
Write my name, nationality, index number, and stare at the 3 booklets completely filled with Mars language. Dechiper a few enough to make a guess, ignore the rest, raise your hand and leave.
The beautiful lady examiner asked you how was ‘it’ before collecting your paper?
Lightly snorted, shook my head, sayonara.
Meet your parents later at Sogo?
Pretend to cry (guys who still know how to cry are sensitive guys).
Your uncle, seeing you in such devastated state, suggested we make a trip to Low Yatt to look for your iPod Shuffle?
Smile.
Your uncle, definitely underestimating your budget, asked the shopkeeper (his friend) to show you ‘iPods’ worth more than RM1000 at the very least?
Repeatedly state that these ‘iPods’ are too fancy for my taste and suggested other options. Sadly, even after we combed Low Yatt, we couldn’t find a single iPod Shuffle, not even the 512 model.
You find your uncle actually need more time to screen mp3 players than buying a house, considering he’s a CEO, making choices should be swift, effective and fruitful?
Questioned whether your uncle is a CEO, later realising that he usually comes home at around 10, so he IS a CEO as the extra 5 hours is used for making choices.
After much agony and round-the-world questioning, you can’t find anything comparable to Shuffle?
Go for dinner.
The next day, before leaving, your uncle gave you a huge bag containing neckties, stating you might not need it in the near future yet, but it make a good collection?
Silently laugh at both of us (during his last visit I was in terrible condition finding a suitable tie for JPA interview). Thanking him of course.
Reached Penang, open up the bag and found that 8 upon 10 of the ties are too senior for your age?
Still thanked him, because I won’t have to buy birthday presents for 8 male birthdays to come. And the other 2 are real cute if they have more Mickey Mouse on them.

This entry was posted on Monday, May 1st, 2006 at 6:30 am and is filed under Uncategorized. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can skip to the end and leave a response. Pinging is currently not allowed.